In only a few days, the 2016 Election Primaries finally shift from just the candidates talking to Iowa voters having their say in caucuses.
Among all the poll numbers and debates and verbal jabs being thrown around, there’s a juicy piece of news that didn’t get near the amount of media coverage: a fictional erotic story about Donald Trump.
The story began when Comedian Elijah Daniel tweeted on January 20:
i’m going to get drunk tonight and write an entire donald trump sex novel like 50 shades of grey & put it on amazon tomorrow i swear to god.
Elijah Daniel, unlike many politicians, stayed true to his word and self-published Trump Temptation: The Billionaire & The Bellboy. The novella is soaring on Amazon. As of today, the e-book is number 1 on two of their categories: humorous erotica and gay erotica.
Readers seem to be enjoying the book, judging by the 243 reviews — and a staggering 93% of them are 5 stars! This is the kind of feedback that self-published authors drool over. Here’s a small taste, written by the anonymously named Purchases:
If “50 Shades of Grey” had been written by someone who wasn’t a Twilight fangirl, and edited by an actual editor, “Trump Temptation” would be that book. The twists and turns (and steamy, true-to-life depiction of the BDSM lifestyle) will leave you as breathless as our protagonists. I look forward to reading more from author Elijah Daniel in the years to come; he has a bright future as an author.
According to The NY Daily News, Daniel took just four hours to write the 10-page novella, while imbibing “trashy mom white zinfandel.”
If you’d like some peeks into what resulted from that Zinfandel-fueled writing sprint, head over to Cosmopolitan for nine excerpts. Here’s one to tickle your funny bone — and possibly the blood flowing faster to your naughty bits. Cue the cheesy porn music while your eyeballs feast on this:
It was him. It was Donald! He stood there in front of me, like a tall stallion. With his oily orange skin glistening in the sunlight as if he were a soggy cheeto, his hair unkept and messy, like a gorgeous rat’s nest. He was beautiful.
I’ve read critics claim that 50 Shades of Grey marked the end of civilization as we know it, and I leave it up to you to decide whether Trump Temptation either picks civilization off the ground or stomps an orange boot on it.
Daniel has certainly found success from his novella, and he’s springing from it. As reported by Newsmax, he hired a Trump impersonator to read the audio version of the story, and sequels are in the works. Do I smell an epic trilogy here? But that’s not all. Supposedly, two TV series have come out of the novella’s success. No word on what those TV series are about, though.
Will Trump Temptation inspire other authors to try their hand at writing humorous erotica involving political candidates and try to snag some of that popularity? Lacey Noonan already came out with A Cruzmas Carol: Ted Cruz Takes a Dickens of a Constitutional (in December), but that didn’t strike as loud a chord as the Trump story — since it has no reviews on Amazon.
I have to admit that it’s, well, tempting to give a shot at a humorous piece to see where it goes. I had fun writing Bavarian Beauty, which tried to instill humor with romance and sexiness. But that novel was about a man’s fixation with dirndls, not politicians.
A humor story will need to wait, as writing Billionaire (just a working title) is going very well. I started the romantic story last spring, then put it to the side since I was having trouble with it.
What a difference a year makes. This story has been in the back of my mind, trying to sort itself out, and the writing is much smoother now. The billionaire in this book isn’t Donald Trump — nor Christian Grey. Instead, I’m trying to make him into his own character. And it’s been quite fun. No white Zinfandel has helped the writing process, but maybe I should try it with another story.